Praise Be to Elonica (Week 2 Day 8) November 13, 2024
Days to Midterm Election (per Constitution 11/05/2024) = 722 Days to Presidential Election (per Constitution 11/05/2024) = 1453
In England November 5th is Guy Fawkes Day, commemorating a failed plot to blow up the Houses of Parliament in 1605. Brits have chanted for centuries:
Remember, remember the fifth of November Gunpowder, treason, and plot.
Our November 5th was every bit as dramatic. Our people, having consumed all of the factual information available via a free press operating without foreign interference and augmented by a plethora of vetted, unbiased digital information, decided in a fair election to create Elonica. Predictably, as soon as enough of the results were in – some states are still counting – the pundits initiated a virulent game of “Who’s To Blame?”
Joe Biden is their favorite whipping boy. He is taking incoming from the talking heads on TV, newspaper columnists, Republicans, and members of his own party. He got older while in office. As he aged he diminished – which the Democrats conspired to hide from everybody until the fateful debate. He should not have run for re-election. When he made the tardy decision under pressure to exit the race, he should not have anointed Kamala Harris. Once he anointed Kamala Harris, he should have gotten out of her way rather than bumbling around trying to help.
And then there is his performance in office. After 20 years of war, Joe Biden bungled the US exit from Afghanistan in August 2021 attempting foolishly to honor the previous administration’s work and timelines. His priority to end the pandemic was frivolous as the pandemic was ending anyway without intervention thanks to herd immunity and our new understanding that masks and vaccinations were not efforts to save lives, but rather infringements of our Constitutional rights not to wear masks or get vaccinated. The pandemic would not have been that big of a deal if scientists like Fauci had not intruded themselves into America’s response. Post-pandemic world-wide inflation should not have impacted us because we enjoy American exceptionalism. When wars broke out in Ukraine and the Middle East, Biden chose to support our allies. He should have been more supportive of Israel but also more supportive of the Palestinians. He should not have supported Ukraine at all because it costs too much and they are not a NATO country and if we were not supporting Ukraine bread and milk and gas and Happy Meals would be so much more affordable here at home.
Kamala Harris, meantime, mismanaged her 105-day campaign. She took women for granted, failed to reach out to young people, and turned off men of all stripes. She stayed loyal to her boss when she should have thrown him under the bus. She talked too much about her opponent and should have banged home her policy ideas – because her opponent never talked about her and was instead crystal clear about his policies. She answered an interviewer’s question to assert that her opponent is a Fascist, providing yet another example of how she could not bring herself to answer questions directly. In fact, her fondness for “word salad” responses was just too much unlike her opponent’s cogent, focused articulation. As a previous prosecutor, she is soft on crime. As a Californian with middle class roots, she is an elitist liberal who enforced the Trump administration’s policies regarding transgender care in prisons. Her campaign’s traditional ground game – door knocking and talking to people – distracted from the reality that people didn’t know enough about her or her policies.
Uncle already. MSNBC, the New York Times, and the rest of the media world will go on for months about what happened and didn’t happen on November 5th. Not helpful. How about we abandon blame and focus instead on praise? After all, if Elonica is the manifestation of Making Great that it could prove to be, we will need to know who to thank. Here’s a start:
Ronald Reagan, who taught America that government is the problem and not the solution, who brought us supply side economics and inspired generations of Americans to this day to look up waiting for the trickle down.
Supreme Court Justices John Roberts, Clarence Thomas, and Samuel Alito, who paved the way for the purchase of the presidency and thus the founding of Elonica with the 2010 Citizens United ruling.
Mitch McConnell, who (1) cleverly manipulated protocol so Elonica boasts a Supreme Court that works directly for the leader and his agent the President, and (2) ensured that future president of Elonica would not be disqualified in 2024 by an impeachment conviction in 2021.
Kevin McCarthy, 269-day SAFM (Speaker and Former Member) of the House, who reincarnated Elonica’s figurehead president by being the first to understand the importance of kissing his ring at Mar a Lago after the flawed election of 2020 and the peaceful protest that followed on January 6.
Most important, the Trump Voters who saw the need to perform a hard reboot of the United States, able to see past bankruptcies and convictions and crudeness to stay focused on real truth rather than fake news in dogged pursuit of the new era of prosperity that Elonica will provide.
Perhaps, like the Brits, we need our own chant for November the 5th. Perhaps
Remember, remember the fifth of November Petulance, Payback, and Gloat?
Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves.
Phillipians 2:3-4
It’s Morning in Elonica (Week 1 Day 1 ) November 6, 2024
Days to Midterm Election (per Constitution 11/05/2024) = 729 Days to Presidential Election (per Constitution 11/05/2024) = 1460
Yesterday’s election was like driving past the scene of an accident on the highway. I knew it was not going well for me – or people like me — and yet I couldn’t stop looking to see just how bad the damage was.
My country has spoken. Perhaps because I have read too many banned books, I find its messenger repugnant. I fear his message extrapolated from anger and the lies that feed that anger. However, it is liberating to graduate from so many of the things we were taught about civility – difficult things like treating others as we would like to be treated, not insulting people’s intelligence or heritage or looks or families, not pretending to give your microphone a blow job on a stage in view of children and the world. We can be as coarse as we want to be in public or in private. We are freed from the inconvenience of thinking before we speak. Manners are woke and those who use them are part of the elite. Think how much more effective our communication will be now that we can say whatever we want in whatever way we want to those whose perspectives differ from ours and are thus just flat out fucking low-IQ wrong.
On this first morning in the new order I am also excited that we are no longer pretending to be a nation where every person’s participation in democracy matters as much as every other person’s. Living in a reliably partisan state, no one seems to care much about my vote. My family in Pennsylvania and North Carolina get a whole lot more attention than I do. What matters is money. Money talks. Dark money used to be something that gave us pause. We knew it was there in the election process – a mysterious malevolent force like Satan – but we looked away and attributed getting elected to things like campaigning well or establishing a track record of serving the people. Things are refreshingly unambiguous now. If we are not independently wealthy enough to buy a second home in a state that interests us and self-fund our election to Congress, then all we need do is select a wealthy person to serve. JD Vance is a heartbeat from the presidency because he was clever enough to let a wealthy friend buy him a Senate seat.
Which brings us to my hopes for life in Elonica. Despite my reservations about our newly elected leader, I stand ready to serve the wealthiest man in the world who directs satellites and space travel and electric cars and X. I am assuming that he will eventually use the president he purchased to tell me how best to contribute. (Regrettably, I am too old to bear more white children and so I cannot fulfill my true function as a woman in our brave new world.) While I await further instruction, what I can do is document our successes in this new manifestation of democracy. I will keep the record of how our lives get so much better so easily now that the nation has elevated the one man who can fix things.
Welcome to Elonica! Let the making great begin!
But now, by dying to what once bound us, we have been released from the law so that we serve in the new way of the Spirit, and not on the old way of the written code.
