Embracing Elonica does not mean turning away from everything American. It’s Thanksgiving. I delayed this post to spend some time with family.
Thanksgiving is important in Elonica. An Elonican Thanksgiving, like Elonica writ large, builds from the American experiment, tossing out only that which impedes The Leader’s ability to make us Greater. (The regulation of things like air quality and medications creates untenable boundaries to the accumulation of vast personal wealth by The Leader and his friends. Such misguided policies impede the trickling down to the rest of us, denying us the source of our well-being. Eliminating all such regulations right out of the gate is the prudent thing to do.) But Thanksgiving is different. Thanksgiving is a money maker. We can’t just abandon it wholesale.
Now that The Leader’s chosen lackey is going to drill baby drill our way to $1.00 gas – man oh man it will be wonderful to get back to that – even more of us can afford to travel to be with our families. There we can be inspired by the Orange Minion’s inspirational Thanksgiving messages:
Happy Thanksgiving to all, including to the Radical Left Lunatics who have worked so hard to destroy our Country, but who have miserably failed, and will always fail, because their ideas and policies are so hopelessly bad that the great people of our Nation just gave a landslide victory to those who want to MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN! Don’t worry, our Country will soon be respected, productive, fair, and strong, and you will be, more than ever before, proud to be an American!
As opposed to the old kind of message from the old president who nearly ruined the country:
With hearts full of gratitude: Happy Thanksgiving, America. Jill and I are so grateful for the trust you’ve placed in us these past four years — serving you has been the honor of our lives. You know we’re blessed to live in the United States of America. We’re literally the greatest country on Earth. No matter what, we never give up. We keep going. We keep the faith in America.
Thanksgiving in Elonica is a retail juggernaut. Now that capitalism is back on track, we can start Black Friday even earlier, making more money for companies like Amazon and Walmart. These really great companies avoid distractions like unions and paid family leave because their leaders know that if they get richer, we get the trickle down that makes the middle class. Once the tariffs that strengthen the free market are in place, we are in for some worker-centered prosperous times indeed.
In the spirit of the Greatness to come:
- I am thankful for a free and fair election (known to be so because The Leader’s investment paid off) in which a 1% margin of victory provided a clear mandate that it’s time to transition from America to Elonica.
- I am thankful that The Leader recognized after 250 years the weaknesses in a Constitution premised on the goodness of people.
- I am thankful that the people who questioned and marched and protested in 2017 have seen the light and are staying home after November’s decisive victory. The Radical Left Lunatics are tired, dispirited, and ready to celebrate Elonica.
- I am thankful that the misguided people who voted against Elonica can be easily persuaded to embrace the new order if the right disinformation is strategically disseminated.
- I am thankful that the countries of Europe and other democracies are moving forward without us, leaving Elonica to partner with other oligarchies more like us who share our commitment to white nationalism and religious clarity. Elonica has moved beyond our old allies and is ready to be part of a new axis of power led by strong and wealthy men.
- I am thankful that the Leader can achieve long sought peace in the Middle East by letting Netanyahu take Palestine. This will honor the great love the American people have always shown – before, during, and after the Holocaust – for the Jewish people. And provide opportunities for Elonican real estate development.
- And, most importantly, I am thankful to live among a wide circle of friends and acquaintances who intend me no harm and will be sad when the military comes to take me to camp.
Enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise; give thanks to him and praise his name.
Psalms 100:4