Happy Liberation Day! Bring on the tariffs!
I have to admit I’ve wavered some this week. So much of what is happening in Elonica is unfamiliar. Strange even. Unsettling. While my day-to-day life has not changed much at all, the images of Becoming Great Again are coming so fast and furious that I don’t always have time to digest and celebrate them properly. I wonder if this is what it felt like to be a patriot in the early days of the United States. Confronting old problems with fresh ideas. Rejecting what has been in the hopes of attaining what can be. It’s not that I question the wisdom of The Leader purchasing a president to achieve his goals. And surely every day I applaud the scrapping by fiat of cumbersome parts of our old government. No, it’s not that I doubt. It’s just difficult sometimes to wrap my head around Elonica’s daring departures from the democracy I knew.
I’m not sure if any of you remember the early days of the LGBTQ+ conversation, long before the woke revolution that brought us the aberration of same sex marriage and the dangerous acknowledgement of trans people as people. Back in the day young people started wearing one earring. As the saying went, which ear they chose mattered. Straight people supposedly chose left and gay people chose right, hence “Left is right and right is wrong.” Here we are, a few decades later, having finally reached the point where we’ve righted our thinking. In Elonica, right is not only right, but there is no place at all for left. Right is right and left is wrong. Right is right and left is evil. Absolute moral clarity, long overdue.
Certainty is liberating. Even in the midst of my befuddlement at some of the changes happening around me, I know that Elonica is headed in the right direction. It’s right to limit the books that kids read if we don’t want them bumping into the wrong ideas. In fact, removing all national perspective from schools across the country – getting rid of the DEI-infested Department of Education – will ensure that our children receive the education that best serves Elonica. This is just another overdue manifestation of states’ rights. In Elonica, if the states are right – Texas and Florida for example – then they should be able to manage pretty much all of their own affairs. If they are not right – say Maine in its approach to trans students or New York in congestion pricing – then, sadly, Elonica must step in for the good of our people. Thankfully we have a Leader who is so fair and reliable an arbiter of what is right in our changing world that we no longer need the distractions of precedent or other voices in law and government.
It’s right to frame our history in the most positive light, removing The Autobiography of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. from circulation at the US Naval Academy library and appointing JD Vance to curate the collection at The Smithsonian. It is time that minorities among us – and women too – accept again that their role in our history has been that of bystander. Stalwart, brilliant white men did the heavy lifting that brought America its glory. We accepted this truth without question until DEI activists promoted The 1619 Project and determined that white people should feel guilty about our heritage. Elonicans can be proud of our progress as a nation only if it is portrayed as the flawless journey to freedom The Leader and his sidekick president believe it to be. Hispanics and Muslims and Jews and Native Americans and Blacks and women did not sign the Declaration of Independence. Their role in our history, like their role in our present, was/is to support white men of merit who possess the acumen to defer to The Leader.
And it’s right to begin thinking now about midterm elections in 2026 and the presidential election two years after that. We have to ensure that only the right people vote. Surprisingly, our transition to Elonica is proving to be rockier than advertised, requiring sacrifices some among us are hesitant to make. The stock market is tanking just as The Leader has determined that the only way to improve Social Security is to break it. So there might be elderly citizens with no means of support. Of course real Elonicans don’t need Social Security – a program burdened by waste benefitting only fraudsters and other societal leeches – but there might be retirees angered by sudden changes who recklessly vote for a candidate who isn’t right on the issues. And these voters might have family members who support them in this voting folly. And of course anyone of minority descent can’t be trusted to understand or embrace aggressive deportation or the elimination of DEI hires, no matter how essential these actions are to Making Us Great Again. Diversity – of people, of ideas – weakens us, just when The Leader needs us to be strongest. It bears remembering that 75,019,230 people voted against The Leader’s orange candidate. It stands to reason that some of them might try to obstruct Elonica’s progress if we give them the opportunity to vote again. Better to redistrict and change unfriendly state laws now than risk an unfortunate election later.
Finally, I’ve heard enough about The Leader buying elections while the president he purchased plays golf. The left is so predictable. Of course it is right that those with the presence of mind to inherit and/or earn fortunes should have a disproportionate say in choosing our leaders. This is Elonica, land of merit, not America, land of engineered equality. As to the golf: the Muppet President has traveled to one of his golf resorts only 9 of his 10 weekends in office. The Huffington Post (fake news – grain of salt here) purports that this has cost taxpayers 26 million dollars. No worries. Pocket change given our untold savings in eliminating USAID alone. After all, our leaders need to rest and recharge. Rebooting a country is exhausting work. It is only right that we give them everything they deserve as they work tirelessly to launch our Golden Age.
OMG news flash Wisconsin actually elected a liberal Supreme Court judge despite The Leader’s 25 million dollar investment in a superior MAGA candidate! They will regret this. Time for The Leader to direct his bought-and-paid-for president to withhold federal money to Wisconsin colleges, schools, social services, and the like until these misguided souls can be brought into line.
But loss notwithstanding, you gotta admit that The Leader can rock a cheesehead.
So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.
James 4:17
