It’s Earth Day. I hope that you are finding time to celebrate as I am the glories of this planet we call home. Fear not – I’m not out hugging trees and stumping for the Green New Deal. Instead I am spending the day marveling at all the ways our President and the billionaires who direct him are enhancing life on Earth. Earth Day is oh so much more splendid in the luminescence of Elonica’s Golden Age.
Rather than subject you to my usual speculation about the importance of this and that – selecting what matters from all of the acts of brilliance of our new Elonican government – I thought I’d just name a few for you to ponder as part of your Earth Day revels. It makes no sense to keep you attached to your screens today. This is a day to touch grass, enjoy sky, and see how many shades of green you can name.
Take heart in one or more of these:
🌍 If we make it lawful for oil companies to drill in some protected lands and waters, we generate enough wealth for the oil-garchs to share their wealth through The Trickle Down. We will thus be wealthy enough ourselves to have time to enjoy any remaining public lands.
🌍 Once we have Iran’s nuclear dust in our hands and can annex Cuba, Greenland and Canada, Elonica can return to its core value of spreading democracy, justice, and peace through strength. God and his son Dr. Jesus want us to rule the world.
🌍 The richest man in the world, working in concert with other very rich and wealthy men, are flooding the 2026 election cycle with enough money to ensure that only the right people are elected. They have been heartened by the extraordinary success of their investment in our purchased President and want to expand Elonican progress.
I can’t remember a happier, more hopeful time to be alive. God’s in his heaven, his emissaries fill our government, and all’s right with the world.
Get out there and bask in it.
In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth.
GENESIS 1:1
